Lost in Baseball…
Like most of the world, I’ve been gearing up because for tomorrow’s season premiere of Lost. Unlike most people, I’ve crammed the entire season into about 3 days of DVD viewing. (I missed most of last season- getting lost, so to speak, after about the 7th episode. I knew if wasn’t ready for the 2nd season, I’d have to TiVO the first couple episodes, and end up hopelessly behind again. For reference, check my attempts to follow Fox’s Prison Break, scuttled after 2 Mondays.)
Needless to say, I’ve spent the last couple days with those crazy castaways on the brain, and honestly, it’s cut into my baseball time (Between the pennant race, Lost, and Fantasy Football, there really aren’t enough hours in the day). My little DVDathon got me thinking. Yeah, the pennant race is pressure. Sure it’s tough to look down the barrel of a 2-2 fastball with a man on third, a 1/2 game lead in the wild card, and 50,000 fans screaming at you. But try walking through the "Dark Territory" while "the others" are breathing down your neck and you’ve got a boat you want to launch made from bamboo and twine into a very large ocean with no particular idea of where you’re headed (I’m currently on the 2nd to last episode…).
So in that spirit, I’d like to make some comparisons. If those characters on the pressure filled environment of Lost were teams in the pressure filled pennant race, which ones would they be?
Jack (Matthew Fox)- Dependable, honorable, highly motivated, and seems to be good at everything you need to do on an island. Solid in every area, all Jack seems to lack is a fully developed sense of humor. All business, his satisfaction comes in seeing the job done. He’s probably the best thing the island has to offer.
HIS TEAM: St. Louis Cardinals. So focused, they refused to celebrate their division title when they had technically clinched- no that didn’t happen a month ago- through tiebreakers against the Astros. Instead, they waited one more day. These guys mean business.
John Locke (Terry O’Quinn)- Enigmatic and extremely resourceful, he is the MacGyver of the jungle. A boy scout on steroids. An encyclopedia of stuff the rest of us learn on The Nature Channel. He lost a kidney, lost his legs, got them back, lost them again, and got them back again. You just can’t get rid of the dude. Plus, he’s full of riddles. Everyone likes riddles.
HIs Team: The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim– Every time it seems like they’re dead, they come back to life. They’ve lost their power hitter (Steve Finley, who has basically ****** all year), and another power source (Dallas McPherson). But they’ve stayed on top. Why? Because they’re resourceful. Any team whose second leading home run hitter is stuck on 15 (Garrett Anderson) needs to be.
Kate (Evangeline Lilly)- She’s young, she’s hot, she’s gonna be good for a long time. You’d think by looking she wouldn’t be helpful, or couldn’t do any damage, but lo and behold, she kicks serious a**. And as for Evangeline Lilly, how the heck did anyone go this long without discovering them?
Her Team: The Cleveland Indians- They’re young, they’re hot, and they’re gonna be good for a long time. You’d think by looking that they might not be helpful (okay, I picked them to win the division), or at least you would have thought that 40 games into the season. Lo and behold, they can do a ton of damage, and kick some serious a**. How did we go so long without discovering them?
Boone (Ian Somerhalder)- Runs a wedding company (not too manly), has a crush on his step-sister, tries to be brave, tries to be useful. He’s good looking enough that you think something good will come out of him, but he just ends up dead in the end.
His Team: The New York Mets- They have a crush on their step brothers (the Yankees), or at least their success. They try to be brave, and they want desperately to be useful (hence Omar Minaya’s offseason spending spree). They look good enough on paper, with Beltran, Pedro, Benson, and Wright, but in the end, they just end up dead.
Sawyer (Josh Holloway)- He plays dirty, is more than a little unpleasant, and nobody likes him. And man, oh man, has that guy got some serious family issues.
His Team: The New York Yankees- Think for a second. Isn’t a seven gazillion dollar payroll past kosher? Isn’t collecting an all-star team kind of unfair? Ignore for a second that at this point, they’re season rests on Aaron Small and Robinson Cano as much as the Unit, A Rod and Sheffield. That’s not how it was supposed to happen. Outside of New York, nobody roots for these guys. And any team run by George Steinbrenner is gonna have some family issues. That’s a given.
Hurley (Jorge Garcia)- Entertaining, occasionally useful, bloated comic relief.
His Team: San Francisco Giants- Fine, they’re not entertaining, and they don’t really provide any comic relief (it’s not like they’re the Rockies, or anything). But sitting 11 games under .500 with a $90+ million payroll, they’re certainly bloated.